Attack of the Ex's

WITHOUT PREJUDICE

2005-04-04T02:29:00.000-07:00

If she sends one more email that starts out with...
WITHOUT PREJUDICE....
I think I'll scream.......... does she thinks she's a lawyer now? She really needs to make up her mind about what she's pretending to be...... for several years she told people she was a Psychologist... then she switched it to telling people she was a Child Psychologist........now she thinks she's a friggin lawyer too? Talk about identity crisis! A new mental illness to add to the list.......oh goody.

Fraud Alert!

2005-04-04T02:17:00.000-07:00

CB has recently sent an email in which she claims that she is no longer mentally ill! Wow! They've found a cure for Bi-Polar and Obsessive Complusion! You'd think we'd have heard on the news about this great leap in the medicinal world.

The thing I don't quite understand..... CB has been on a disability pension from her work for the last 11 years... she is bringing in some big time bucks TAX FREE each month, in fact after taxes she makes pretty much the equivilant of Jack and considering he gave her the house which was completely paid for she has no expenses. She's sitting very pretty. But in order for her to remain on this disability pension, she must constantly be supplying medical reports to them that she is still too nuts to handle the stress of a job.

So my question is this....... if CB is no longer mentally ill..... how is it she is still receiving this disability pension?? Wouldn't that be ummmm,,,,,,,,, fraud??

Oh.... I forgot to mention.... CB got herself into a bit of trouble when she was working for uh..... fraud.... seems she was billing an insurance company for hours she wasen't actually working, so I guess this is nothing new to her.

Oh....yeah.. and then there was that minor minor fender bender she got into.... which she then ran out and rented herself a neckbrace... a cane..... and yes... a wheelchair. It was quite a sight to see. Funny how quick that neck brace came off when she'd go out drinking and dancing though.

April Fool!

2005-04-04T01:23:00.000-07:00

For the last few weeks, we have been receiving emails from CB, in which she sounds EXTREMELY amicable. They are lovely letters, all about wanting to do better co-parenting, willing to be listen to our input on items,,,they are albeit peppered with some distortion of reality... they are written as if Jack as been the difficult unagreeing emotionally child abusing parent... but none the less.. they are all very SANE sounding.

You would think this would give us cause to be happy! For us to jump for joy and say....."Ahhhh...her meds have finally kicked in! This may work out!".....which we did the first time we started receiving emails like this several years ago. But unfortunately......we have since learned what these emails mean... and they are no cause for celebration.

When these emails start coming.....two-three weeks later....a letter from CB's latest lawyer (#6 I believe) arrives threatening a law suit. She sends these emails because she thinks they will show her to be a normal individual. We have been expecting this one and sure enough,,, her pattern has held out and the latest one arrived April Fools Day. Completely fitting, I thought, considering who sent it.

This time we are being threatened to be sued for the following reasons...

Because we would like to have Kelly play on the same baseball team as her step brother (as she did last year) so that we can get them both to their games. All three of our kids are in baseball... baseball is on the same evening every night, there is only two of us.... so do the math.. we can't be in three places at once. CB only ever attented two games last year but for some reason has a huge issue with this.
CB claims that Jack refuses to go to mediation with him, although Jack has informed CB several times that he is more than willing to go if she will pay her half.
Vacation schedule.... now this one is funny... when settling their divorce agreement CB INSISTED that the agreement be that both parties had to submit their 3 week vacation times with Kelly by March 31 and if they don't, they do not get their vacation with Kelly. Each year we have submitted our holidays dates WELL BEFORE the due date. CB has NOT ONCE,,, NEVER! Which makes it incredibly hard for us to plan our summer excusions or to try to co-ordinate with my exhusband vacation dates with our kids. She will contact us 2 days before she would like to have Kelly and expect us to cancel all our plans. We have stupidly complide as we don't want to punish Kelly for her mothers inconsideration. This year we told CB we would not be complying, that she must get her dates in on time. That this can't continue. CB has informed us that it is UNFAIR to make her submit by the date that SHE set (although she still feels we must)... she says.. that Dave's (her commonlaw) exwife doesn't submit her holiday dates to them until later.... so they wouldn't be able to co-ordinate the childrens holidays so that they can have a holiday alone for themselves. WELL HELLO, FUCKTARD! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU DO TO US EACH YEAR??? CRY ME A RIVER ABOUT BEING UNFAIR!! We have not been able in 4 years to co-ordinate holidays with my ex because she refuses to give us her dates..... and the only way we get to have a little holiday to ourselves without kids has been to either hire a nanny or find a relative who will watch them. GET OVER YOURSELF, LADY!
And lastly... and this one I almost peed myself laughing about... the lawyer requests that Jack refrain from having ANY MORE verbal hostility towards CB and as well to refrain from bringing up contentious issues in front of Kelly anymore and to limit those discussions to emails. I will tell you,,, I go with Jack to pick up Kelly every time,, I sit in the car while he goes to the door to get her... its not 10 feet from the car.. I can hear every word exchanged... I have never heard Jack raise his voice to CB.... and when she has on the NUMEROUS times started BITCHING very loudly about some issue she is angry about right in front of her child... sometimes even going so far as to drag the child right into her tyrade by questioning the child about incidents.. or telling her "You tell your father this...".. that Jack has always calmly told CB that this was not the appropriate place to discuss this and has led Kelly to the car. In fact, I cannot even think of a time when even dealing with her on the phone after Kelly has gone to bed that he has even so much as raised his voice to her... even on occasions where he probably should have. I can't even count anymore all the copies of phone messages we have saved of CB calling our home that are so foul... one would think she was a drunken sailor. LOL.. she has even gone so far in the past to leave messages for Kelly that go.. "Kelly this is your mother calling... and you tell that asshole father of yours that when you get home baby I am going to tell you all about the games he is playing"....... and then hired a lawyer because we were not playing the phone messages to Kelly!

You know... I am trying to keep my humor about all this...... but it is getting increasingly hard... it has been so many years now... and there is no sign of it ever stopping... like a woodpecker tapping at your head day in day out.....quick.....someone hand me a slingshot.

Bizarre!!!!

2005-04-04T01:12:00.000-07:00

I got home late one evening after everyone had dinner. I had just left a meeting and had forgotten to tell a client something, so when I got in the front door.. I headed straight to our bedroom to give him a quick call. I did not realize that Kelly was on the cordless phone with CB in her bedroom.

I picked up the phone to hear Crazy Bitch CHANTING over and over "You need your mommy...You need your mommy....You need your mommy". And Kelly replying in a robotic baby voice... "Yes mommy I know,, I know"

I will tell you... it literally send a creepy chill down my spine. The visual that came to mind was one of those tape recordings you can buy to play to yourself while your sleeping if you want to brainwash yourself about something.

CB is seriously whacko,,,,,seriously seriously whacko.

I fear Kelly has no chance at being normal. Its very sad to watch.

Egged by the Easter Bunny

2005-04-04T00:43:00.000-07:00

When CB & Jack's divorce agreement had been finalized, holidays other than Christmas had been overlooked in regards to rotation. When this was first realized, several years ago that that would mean, due to how that schedule works, that one parent would have a 4 year stretch with no easters, halloween, birthdays, etc. Jack brought it up to CB and suggested they agree to rotate the major holidays each year regardless of whos care she was in the time.

Initially CB would not agree... as she was due to have her second Halloween in a row, which of course she took. But funnily enough when it entered our cycle to have many years of Halloweens with Kelly,, CB suddenly saw the merit of this decision and agreed. And so we began exchanging holidays.

Last year CB had Kelly for Easter, so this year we were due to have ours. We were technically due to return Kelly Saturday evening, but as Easter was the next day we thought (foolishly in hindsight)that we would be keeping her for Easter as agreed upon and planned accordingly. Even Kelly was of the belief that she would be spending Easter here as she knew she had been at her mothers the year before and looked forward to the Easter Egg hunt with her stepsiblings.

I guess Kelly mentioned this to her mother, and CB quickly got on the phone and informed Jack... that NO, he would not be having Kelly for Easter and whatever gave him the idea that he was. She then denied any knowledge of any such agreement. Even when Jack forwarded her the email in which they had agreed to it,,,, she still pled ignorance and refused to allow Kelly to stay for Easter. Very disappointing for everyone involved.

Next year we will be going into our cycle of 4 years of Easters falling on our dates. I'm sure that CB will once again have a miraculous recovery of her memory and will bring up the arrangement to rotate. To insure that there is no more 'confusion' and assist CB's on again off again alzeihemers, he has written her another email outlining what she has stated presently is her understanding of holidays... and that is... THAT WE DO NOT ROTATE!

Teacher's Pet

2005-04-04T00:11:00.000-07:00

One evening CB (Crazy Bitch) called the house to speak to Kelly. Upon getting on the phone Kelly began apologizing profusely to CB for not calling her that day. She then promised over and over and over again that she would not forget tomorrow. We found this odd considering Kelly had just arrived home from school... when was she have supposed to have called her?? We then heard Kelly ask if Pat (a teacher at Kelly's school) was going to come and remind her.

Jack asked Kelly about this when she got off the phone. Kelly told us that during the days that she is with us, that a teacher from another grade whom CB has befriended at her school has been coming down to her classroom at lunch time when all the other children are going out to play and telling Kelly that "its time to go call your mom". Kelly then spends her lunch time talking in the office on the phone to her mother. We asked Kelly how she felt about this. She said she was sad that she didn't get to play with her friends but that her mother would get very upset with her if she didn't.

Jack of course was livid. CB calls our house all the time when Kelly is here. There is no need to be interrupting her time at school. Jack was also very upset that a teacher would actually be encouraging this. Jack called and spoke to the principal, the principal did not initially believe that could be going on. That they most certainly do not encourage children to be calling home to their parents every day. That at school they try to teach children independence. The principal said she would go and speak to Kelly's teacher and to the teacher Pat to see what was really going on.

When the principal called back, she informed Jack.. that Kelly's teacher had had no idea this was happening and when she went and spoke with Pat that she admitted that she had been doing it. The prinicpal assured Jack that it would NOT be continuing.

I was initially shocked that a teacher would be play into this, but I also recognize that CB is extremely manipulative....and very convincing in her tales of woe. I have no doubt... that she painted a terrible tale to Pat... as I have heard from other people that she has told the same stories to that... ohhhhh... she's never allowed to speak to Kelly when she's at our house....ohhhh...they deny me telephone access.... poor Kelly is so traumatized by it... ohhhh poor Kelly suffers extreme seperation anxiety and needs constant contact with her mother. Oh yes........ someone does suffer seperation anxiety.. but it sure isn't the child.

School Notices

2005-03-11T12:44:00.000-08:00

Isn't it odd.... that although the school knows to stick two copies of all newsletters and forms in Kelly's planner. That when Kelly arrives to our house after being with her mother for four days... that just the school notices about upcoming plays, open houses, teacher interviews, or field trips are always missing from ours? Everything else is there.... but strangely.... anything pertaining to a special event for Kelly that parents can attend always.. poof! disappears. CB feels soooooooo bad for us when we miss these events..."I don't understand how you didn't receive your copy! Darn school!".... yet when we talk to the school... they assure us that indeed our copies were sent home with Kelly. Go figure! A regular bermuda triangle I guess.

Party hats aren't just for kids anymore

2005-03-11T12:26:00.000-08:00

With a shared custody agreement that rotates every 4 days, there are many times when birthday party invitations will arrive home with Kelly while she is with us but are scheduled during a time that she is with her mother. We of course inform CB and send the invitation along so she can RSVP if she plans to have Kelly attend. Normally CB does this in return.

Have I mentioned before that CB is quite enchanted with people she views to have 'status' in the community? She desperately wants to be part of their worlds, as though knowing them will make her somewhat special too. In Kelly's class there is a young boy that Kelly likes very much. His parents are extremely rich. CB desperately wants to be friends with the mother for this reason.

It was this little boy's 7th birthday, the party was being held at one of those amusement parks for little kids with all the tunnels and such. The invitation went home with Kelly while she was in CB's care but the actual party fell on day that Kelly was with us. Now one would think that a mother would not want her child to miss out on a birthday party of a friends and would sent it along. One would even think if the mother DESPERATELY wanted to attend that party herself she might simply ask the other custodial parent if she could take the child herself that afternoon. Do you think that CB did?.......... No! She kept the invitation for herself, never told her daughter, never told us...... and then a 40 year old woman attended a 7 year old boy's birthday party herself. I wonder..... did she throw on a party hat and climb through the tunnels too???

We would not even have found out about this, had not one of our friends also attended the party. The other parents there found it very strange that she would attend without a child and asked why she was there. CB, of course, when asked this, and upon realizing she must have looked like a complete moron, tried to imply that Jack wouldn't allow Kelly to attend. Kelly had to return to school to hear all the children talking about the party and left school feeling that she had not been invited. Nice mother.... hopefully this boy doesn't invite Kelly to their prom years from now... I'd hate to think CB tries to steal her date in order to hob nob with the rich.

Put a sock in it

2005-03-11T12:08:00.000-08:00

Mothers Day, Jack takes the kids for a bike ride so that I can indulge myself in an afternoon nap. I'm not asleep more than 5 minutes when I hear loud banging from the back door. I get up and peek out the window, CB has now gone down the stairs and is peeking in the basement windows.

I open the door and ask.. "Can I help you?" She storms up the stairs saying she knows Jack and the kids are hiding from her. I inform her that no they are not. I ask why exactly is she here? She replies, " I need Kelly's socks!!" I'm not quite sure what the hell she's talking about,, so I mutter out "Socks???"

"Yes," she replies... "When I sent her here yesterday she was wearing a pair of socks from my home". I assure her that when we return Kelly in a few days, we will make sure she returns with these 'socks'. "NO! I need those socks now!". I couldn't help myself and replied... "Why? Are you planning on wearing them yourself?" I mean, crap.... what possible reason did she have for needing socks for a child that wasen't even at her home????

This was not good enough.. she was obsessed with having these socks NOW,,, so to get the crazy woman off my property I went and tore the bedroom apart looking for them.

CB seems to have a hard time allowing anything of Kelly's from CB's house come to our house. CB seems to view all Kelly's possessions as her own. One time we dropped Kelly off with CB on a hot day so she did not have her jacket. 4 days later when we were due to pick her up for our custodial time we arrived at school to find a soaking wet Kelly, her mother had refused to allow her to wear her coat because she did not want it going to our home for 4 days. It is absolutely beyond bizarre, she sent her child to school in the pouring rain in a t-shirt! I have no doubt that if we dropped the child off naked one day, she would send her back to school with no clothes on! LOL

Who's drugs are these?

2005-03-09T08:44:00.000-08:00

Kelly got a cold, which developed into bronchitis while she was at CB's. CB took her to the doctor and he prescribed some medicine. In Jack and CB's divorce agreement, Jack had agreed to pay for all Kelly's prescription drugs and had set up an account at a pharmacy for it all to be charged to him (CB often tried to take advantage of this and put her own medication on it as well). CB picked up the medication for Kelly which was quite expensive and put it on Jacks account. No problem.

The next day Jack arrived to pick up Kelly for her custodial week with us. CB informs about Kelly's illness and that she needs to be on this medication for the next 5 days. Jack looks in Kelly's bag and asks where the medication is? CB replies, "Oh you can't have it, that bottle is mine".

Jack is flabbergasted..."Can't have it? Are you seriously refusing to hand over Kelly's medication?????". Yep......indeed she was. Although the child would not be with her for 4 1/2 days and would not be needing the remainer of the medicine when she arrived back to CB's,,, the crazy woman would still not allow Kelly to take the medication from her home. She expected us to drive a sick child back to a doctors office and have a new prescription issued and rebuy the drugs. Jack tried to reason as calmly as was possible with the woman, pointing out to her that it was not her medication but Kelly's... and that in fact if you really wanted to get picky.. considering he paid for it.. it was his. She would not go for it. WTF? Was she planning on taking the medication herself????

We took Kelly home. I had an appointment and had to go out. Jack stayed home with all the kids, mine had come down with a cold as well. Jack wrote CB an email, saying he intended to pick up Kelly's medicine and also speak to a lawyer regarding CB's withholding prescribed medicine for the chid.

CB phoned the house, saying she would "allow" him to come back and pick up the medication. Jack explained that he was home alone with 3 sick children and was not going to pile them all in the car and drive back across town. That she was going to have to drop them off. CB said she was 'busy taking down her christmas decorations' and couldn't to it. She chose to leave her child without medicine instead!

We ended up having to get our own medication....... and closed the open account for CB to put Kelly's medication on. Now if CB needs to get medication for Kelly she has to purchase it herself then give us a receipt which we will reimburse her for....... if she lets the child actually have it! CB of course did not like this new arrangement, threatened a law suit and hired a lawyer. Once her lawyer was informed that CB was withholding the childs meds,,,,,,we didn't hear from them again,, funny how that works, hey?

Mommy Dearest Part II

2005-03-08T21:55:00.000-08:00

Our holidays with Kelly ended and she went back to her mothers for her 4 1/2 days. When she returned home, she was very quiet. Since Kelly has been about 2-3 she has called CB's common-law Dave, 'Daddy Dave'. CB has encouraged this. My husband Jack does not have a problem with it, after all he is her stepfather. Kelly also began calling me 'Mommy Jane' at around the same time. I have never asked her to call me this nor do I insist upon it. Its just what she has always called me.

This visit,,, (coincidentaly, right after the incident on the phone with Bev where I was accidently referred to as Kelly's mother). Kelly began calling me just 'Jane'. I pretended that I did not notice and did not bring it up with her. Later that day out of habit she slipped and called me 'Mommy Jane'. She covered her mouth and began crying. I bent to give her a hug and asked her why she was upset. I asked why she had stopped calling me 'Mommy Jane'. She told me teary eyed that her Mommy had found out from 'some lady' that she called me Mommy Jane. She then stared into my eyes and told me that her Mommy had told her that if Kelly ever called me that again that she could no longer be her mother. Kelly began sobbing in my arms.

Never have I ever felt like physically harming someone, but at that moment I could have gotten in my car and drove to that crazy womans house and punched her right in the face. Instead, I held my anger in and tried to do my best to console Kelly, assuring her that it didn't matter what she called me, it didn't change what we felt for each other. I talked with her about how I'm sure her Mommy didn't mean that. That Mommy's just don't stop being mommies. That maybe her mommy was just feeling a bit threatened. She has never called me Mommy Jane again,, the odd time that she has slipped,,, she always throws her mouth up to her mouth and comes close to tears she fears it so much. The scary thing is,,,,,, I don't doubt that CB is so crazy that if she found out that she was still calling me mommy that she would withhold her love from the child.

Mommy Dearest

2005-03-08T21:38:00.000-08:00

After our gift opening, several of the family members decided to take the kids down to the park. Jack's mother lied down on the couch for quick nap. We had not told anyone about CB's crazy behaviour. I went to lie down in the bedroom for a nap as well. Jack's mother, Bev, is in her 80's, a very quite and demure woman. The phone rang, as it was out in the living room, Bev answered groggily. A woman, who did not identify herself, asked to speak to Kelly. Bev did not recognize her as CB. Bev explained that Kelly was out with her family.... and then Bev made a fatal mistake... she said... "But her MOTHER is here lieing down, I can wake her if its important"

Holy crap! I don't think Bev has ever heard more foul language in her life!! Her accidently referring to me as Kelly's mother sent CB over the edge. Bev had to hang up on her. The phone began ringing again... the answering machine,, which is in our bedroom kicked in. I was awoken the the insane rantings of CB, the police were coming, lawyers were being called, fuck this, fuck that, blah blah blah.

She called back three more times in the next few minutes. Each message more hostile than the next.

When Kelly arrived home and as soon as the company left, we asked her to please call her mother. Kelly then of course had to go through her 20 minute ordeal of telling CB how loved she was, how life would be over if not for her.... and all the other crap she seems to need to hear in order to feel good about herself.

Of course, CB contacted a lawyer....... did I mention that she's gone through every lawyer in town? When they inform her that perhaps she's a tad obsessed and that perhaps she has to let go a bit, she fires them and moves on to another.

911!!! Wedding in progress!!

2005-03-08T21:04:00.000-08:00

Our wedding day approached, and although CB (Crazy Bitch)had spent the last year trying her best to make Kelly unhappy about it, all the children were estatic and excited about the event. We planned the wedding during our 3 week summer holiday time with Kelly. Family was flying in from back east. Kelly of course was so happy to be spending time with family she had not seen in years that she did not want to spend each evening on the telephone with her mother.

The wedding was obviously getting to CB as she began phoning even more frequently and would refuse to let Kelly get off the phone until Kelly would repeat to her OVER AND OVER again.. "Yes, Mom,,I love you,, Yes,, I told you I do,, I do love you mom. Can I go now Mom? I want to play with my cousins. Yes, I miss you mom,, Yes, I'm thinking of you every minute, Mom,,, Please can i go now Mom?",,, this would go on and on, with Kelly getting very exasperated at having to reassure her mother over and over again. It got to the point that Kelly no longer wanted to accept the calls and it became very hard to get her to call her mother.

Of course, as is the case in all weddings, things are very hectic. You have your last minute planning, rehearsal, rehearsal dinner, etc. We had Kelly call CB in the morning the day before the wedding. That evening we had our rehearsal and dinner and did not arrive home to quite late. Although CB had already spoken to Kelly that day, there was a message DEMANDING Kelly call her again,,, "My child needs to speak to her mother!!!!,, blah blah". Kelly had fallen asleep on the way home, so we put her straight to bed before noticing the message.

Wedding day!! Beautiful moment for all of us. We all had a wonderful time. A family friend took the children home late and Jack and I spent the evening in a hotel. The next day we arrived home early afternoon for our gift opening with our friends and family. The call display showed that CB had called 17 times the of our wedding... did she think we were leaving Kelly at home for the wedding???? The messages were beyond insane, unsuitable for any child to hear. In one she even threatened that if the child did not call her in the next minute she was reporting her as missing to the police.... a child I might add was not even in her legal custodial care at the time. We asked Kelly to call her mother (cause she'd obviously flipped her lid), Kelly promised she would call her as soon as the company left.

The Spy

2005-03-03T14:22:00.000-08:00

It became apparent to us, that someone was feeding CB information about our lives. She seemed to always know where we would be and what we were doing. One person came to mind, a mutual friend we had between us. One day when this friend dropped by, we decided to tell him something ridiculous to see if it would get back to her and if indeed it was this person telling her things about our life.

We told him.... not in front of any of the children... that we were looking at purchasing a house that was in a neighboring town.

Not 24 hours past before we received and email from CB telling us,,, that Kelly (who knew nothing of this story) had shared with her that she was extremely upset about us moving,,, she went on to describe how for the last week Kelly had not been able to sleep at nights (funny...a week hey? is Kelly psychic perhaps?) and that she felt Kelly once again was sooooooo traumatized by our decision to move her to a town that her mother didn't live in that she should probably be seen by a psychologist.

I'm still trying to figure out... is CB so fucking crazy that she honestly believes her horseshit to be true...... or is she just a compulsive liar??

The Engagement

2005-03-03T13:56:00.000-08:00

Jack and I got engaged while away at a cabin on our summer vacation. We had already been living together for quite some time and dating for a couple of years. We sat the kids down and shared the good news. They were estatic!!!! Kelly most of all, she ran around the room jumping up and down. The rest of the week at the cabin, Kelly, who was 4 at the time kept insisting her father and I should have a new baby when we got married. She wanted a new baby sister so much. We tried explaining to her that we already had three kids which seemed like more than enough (actually it feels like 10 some days! lol). She wouldn't hear of it... she wanted that baby,,, and she wanted it now.

The time came to return her to her mothers for 4 days. Unfortunately Kelly made the fatal mistake of sharing her joy about this new baby she wanted her father and I to have and the engagement. When Kelly returned 4 days later to our home,, she was extremely withdrawn.. she said very little until we got home and began making lunch. We sat down to eat.. and she just sat there staring at me, then blurted out..." I don't want you having a baby". I smiled back.. and said.. "Well you don't have to worry, hon because as I told you before we're not going to have one". She looked at me and said, "My mom says if you have a new baby, it will cry all night and keep me up. My mom says that Dad won't be able to play with me anymore if you have a new baby". Believe me,, it is very hard to try to keep a neutral face when you are feeling homicidal towards someone (CB) but I managed to do my best to reassure her that her dad would ALWAYS have time to play with her, that nothing could ever change that.

Crazy Bitch (CB)then sent an email saying how traumatized Kelly was over the whole engagement and baby thing and how she would now be requiring to see a psychologist once again. I have to wonder,,, does CB try to fuck with her kids mine so much cause she gets a special rate from her shrink if she brings in new clients??? Geeshhhhhh!

It was also during this time that CB began telling Kelly that the reason her mother and father could no longer be a family was because of me. She began telling her bizarre stories about how her father was never took care of her when she was a baby. Which is interesting considering CB was in a mental institute for long periods while Kelly was a baby and Jack was the one who went on a maternity leave and raised Kelly. In fact when Jack attempted to return to work as CB seemed some what mentally better, he would arrive home to find the baby sitting in a the tub with a dirty diaper floating around because CB could not bring herself to change her diaper.

CB had returned to her maiden name after the divorce and she began telling Kelly that she didn't have to have her fathers last name and began trying to have it switched to hers, referring to the child and listing her on documents using CB's last name, not the childs real name.

Kelly began being quite hostile towards the members of this family... CB had really stepped up the mindfucking in a hopes to stop the wedding.

So you wanna play baseball, eh?

2005-03-02T22:55:00.000-08:00

After the soccer fiasco, we were still optimistic that there might be some chance at poor Kelly being able to participate in some sort of sport. Jack spoke to CB about the upcoming baseball season and Kelly's desire to play. He explained that as we would have 3 children in the sport and baseball is on the same evening each week for all of them, we would have to have Kelly and Tom on the same team, which the two were very happy about. Being as theirs only 2 of us, one would think it would be pretty easy to understand that we can't be in 3 places at the same time....perhaps she failed math in school... cause CB couldn't really get it. But anyway, she didn't object, she didn't say much really, just kinda shut the door in Jacks face.

So as had been the case in EVERY other activity we had enrolled Kelly in, we didn't hold out much hope that CB would even take her. So for once we enrolled the two of them on a team that was close to our home with children from our area. May I remind you,,,, cause CB has a hard time grasping this concept.... that Kelly lives half her life in this area... wouldn't it be nice for her to make some friends here? Actually it turns out.. that according to CB the wannabe child psychologist,,, it would be emotional 'scarring' for her to have friends here....haven't quite figured out why though yet.

CB found this out and although she did not pay for the baseball nor register Kelly, called the Baseball League and pretended as though she were still married to Jack and requested Kelly be moved to the field beside her home. My son, Tom, was disappointed as he had already been planning to play with several kids from the neighborhood on his team, but as we needed the kids to play together was kind enough to agree to play in Kelly's moms area this year, Kelly in return promised that the following year they would play in ours. We actually had taken it as a good sign that CB had demanded she be moved... weren't really happy how she went about it of course, but at least it appeared that she might actually be taking the child to a sport! I mean,,,, why else would she have the child moved... not to just cause annoyance... noooooooooooo... couldn't be that.

I will give her this... she showed up for 2 games. Hey,,, when your used to nothing.. two is a big improvement. The two games she showed up for were when her parents were in from out of town,,, I got quite a chuckle overhearing their conversation. For an hour I got to listen to CB talk to her parents as though she attended each game, being the supportive mother that she is. On and on she went on about how much Kelly's game had improved and oh what fun it was,, and why just last week she caught the ball,,,,,,,,,,,HELLO!!!!! You don't even come to the games, ya dipshit!

A year as rolled around and just last week it was time to re-register for baseball, again Jack told CB he planned to enroll her,,, again he told her we would need the two little ones to be on the same team in order for us to get all the kids to their games. Registration began at 10:00, we were due to pick up Kelly at 11:30. When we arrived guess where they were just returning from? You betcha,,, baseball registration. Now... that in itself isn't a bad thing. It doesn't matter who registers the child, just that she gets registered. The thing about registration though is this,,, there is a field you must fill in if you need your child to play with another child, the names MUST be reciprocated on each childs form or they do not get placed together. Now CB was well aware we had to have the kids together on the team, so did she put my sons name down on the form? What do you think????? NOT!!
She then tells Jack his "family issues and schedules" aren't her or Kelly's concern. Hey wait a minute,,,, I thought Kelly was a member of this family? Oh thats right,, her mother is always telling her she's not,,, so I guess I was wrong. CB tells Jack thats a shame, guess he'll have to decide which child doesn't go, his daughter or his step-son. At that moment.. I seriously could have punched her lights out. Jack stood his ground and told her if she did not have the form changed to add Tom and also reminded her that this year was our turn to have them play in our area. That Tom had comprised last year to accomodate her and she hadn't even bothered going, that it was unfair to expect Tom to go through the same thing again this year. CB said she would rather Kelly miss half the season again that change her mind. What is wrong with this friggin woman???? When I say area...I'm not talking an hour drive, we live in a small town.. I'm talking a ten minute drive. Once again she states that Kelly can only play by her "home",,she refuses to acknowledge that this is her "home" too,, where she spends,, not just every second weekend.....but HALF HER FRIGGIN LIFE!

Control Freak

2005-03-02T19:49:00.000-08:00

I am assuming because her own life is completely out of control, that CB feels the need to control those all around her. For example,,, activities... with shared custody both parents have to be on board so that child can actually attend any programs she is involved in. CB from day one, as continually enrolled Kelly in numerous activities, swimming, Sparks, etc. Although she knows we both work,, have 2 other children in our family. CB on the other hand has no job,,,unless you consider being psychotic work,,, and has a completely open schedule, she never has the courtesy to check with us what days might work better for our schedule. Never the less, we always make sure we get Kelly to every activity CB enrolls her in. One would think that when we enroll her in a program that CB would make some attempt to get her child there so that Kelly doesn't miss half...........NOT!

Swimming... CB had enrolled her 3 prior levels and mentioned that she wanted her to take a fourth. She had always put her in Tuesdays and Thursday afternoons, so assuming that those days worked for her we enrolled Kelly for the fourth. As my children had been going on Monday and Wednesdays before which meant we were at the pool 4 days a week, we placed my children in classes on Tuesday and Thursdays, as my childrens classes ended, Kelly's began. One would think this makes sense, making our schedule far less hecticl on the days we have all the children. CB initially agreed to take Kelly but upon arriving at the pool and seeing that she would be forced to see my children for a total of 20 seconds as they exited the pool,,, she pulled Kelly right out of her class and refused to ever take her again.

Karate.... CB mentioned that she would like to have Kelly enrolled, our kids also wanted to attend and the kids were excited about being able to take a class together. CB when hearing that we had put all children in the class refused once again to allow Kelly to attend during the periods she was with her. She denied that she had ever said she wanted Kelly in Karate,,, although she had clearly written it in the 'back and forth' book that is used for communication between the two homes. Even when this was pointed out to her, she still vehemently denied that she ever wrote it.

Soccer.... Jack enrolled her at Kelly's request. She was assigned by the soccer assn to a team and a field, the field was about a 4 minutes drive from CB's home and 15 minutes from ours. CB refused to take Kelly to this citing the reason that the field was too far from their home. She said she did not want Kelly playing with any children from areas other than her own neighborhood. Did I mention that CB lives in one of the nicest areas of town and feels children who are not from her upscale area are beneath her daughter. When explained to CB that segregation had been done away with some time ago and that the soccer assn allowed children from all walks of life to play on soccer teams, there was nothing we could do change this. She still stuck to her guns saying she only wanted her playing with kids from her school and CB's neighborhood. As it turned out 6 of the kids on Kelly's team were classmates of hers,,,, CB just came up with a new excuse though. Kelly missed 50% of all practises and games and fell far behind the other girls in skills,,, which made her extremely self conscious. As well.. the other girls had had more time to develop little cliches,,, leaving Kelly out in the cold.

Funnily enough we recieved an email from CB informing us that we were never again to enroll Kelly in anything that fell on her time,,,, kinda hard to do when the child moves between the two houses every 4 days. Also funnily enough.. the very next day she sent another email to us informing us that she had enrolled Kelly in an Art Program and that the very first class was on day that Kelly was with us,, my birthday to be exact,,, she gave us instructions as to what days we were to have her there,,,,, guess she musta forgotten about her new rule about not enrolling the child on the other persons time,,,,, geesh! Unfortunately, for the first time ever, we would not be able to take Kelly to the first class as we had booked a trip out of town for my birthday. We informed her that we would not be able to get her to the first one but that we would of course make sure she attended any others that fell on our days. CB went into a rage, demanded we cancel our trip, that I could celebrate my birthday another day. She then told us that she was pulling Kelly out of the Art lessons and demanded us to reimburse us for the cost of the program... a program I might add she never bothered to ask us if we could get the child to before enrolling her.

Have I told you yet that the custody agreement states that extracurricular activities for the child will be paid for jointly between the two parents. We have always paid for half of Kelly's programs that CB enrolls her in,,,, even though she never checks with us prior to enrolling her. CB on the other hand has always and continues to NOT pay for any of the activities we enroll Kelly in.

I know, I know,, perhaps you are thinking... well the poor dear she doesn't have a job, it must be hard to afford to pay. But she does have a job,,, remember... she's the Professional Patient... she receives close to 4,000 per month tax free on a 'mental disability' insurance plan. As well, when Jack left her shortly after her last suicide attempt, he let her keep the house that was completely paid for (so no mortgage) and is worth well more than 300,000, she got all the furniture and the brand new car she ran out and purchased when she realized Jack was leaving her. She as well now has her live in boyfriend who I'm sure would is paying all the household expenses in return for living their rent free. In fact the only thing that Jack did leave with was his clothes and the 30,000 debt on the line of credit he incurred when in one of her manic states she purchased a shit load of Nortel stocks, which are absolutely worthless now. Don't worry about Crazy Bitch's financial state,,, believe me ,,, she ain't hurting.

Mayhem, Murder and Mischief Con't

2005-03-02T14:23:00.000-08:00

Kelly, only 4, astutly stated once about her mothers behaviour... "Its like she's trying to make me miss her". She even once commented that she thought her mom worked for the CIA, as she always seemed to know where'd we be and showed up to follow us.

When Kelly entered Kindergarden... it was extremely hard on CB, although Kelly loved school and was thriving. CB was convinced that she was being traumatized by not being with her mother. Kelly had been in her class for over 2 weeks, the teacher had a rule that no parents were allowed to visit in class for the first month as she needed the children to learn to be independant. CB could not endure this,,, although she would be allowed in in 2 weeks,, she could not wait and although her daughter had already settled into the class, CB contacted the prinicipal and told him that 'due to custody and daycare issues' she needed Kelly to be transferred to another Kindergarden class. Coincidently one that the teacher did allow parents into the classroom.

CB then phoned Jack, she told him that the daycare had informed him that Kelly was having emotional troubles in daycare and that none of the kids from her class attended the daycare when she went. She said the daycare had suggested that Molly be switched to the afternoon Kindergarden class so that when she went to daycare after she would be with more of her friends. Although she had already contacted the school and without Jack's consent had requested the transfer, she told Jack she had not. Jack,, said that he would be willing to consider it but that he just wanted to talk to the daycare first. CB knowing she was lying begged him not to,, saying that Kelly would be too embarrassed if he did. Jack smelling a rotten egg, told her to let him think about it. Jack immediately phoned the daycare, they had no idea what he was talking about, what CB said was going on was not true,,,,and that there were several kids from Kelly's class in daycare with her already. They said that Kelly was not emotional traumized that she was doing very well. But they did inform Jack that CB had shown up the day before sobbing because the teacher had not allowed her into Kelly's class. Jack called the principal, found out what CB had told him and set him straight. Kelly was not moved. CB was absolutely livid, called her ranting and raving that "Her child needs her! She will be moved! Just watch and see!". Of course it never happened, the school recognized it was not in the childs best interest.

Have I mention yet that CB is also a hypochondriac? In the last 5 years, I believe she has had (according to her) flesh eating disease, cancer, asmtha, etc, etc. She also believes Kelly is constantly ill. For awhile she believed that Kelly was allergic to pretty much all foods and had her on a diet that consisted of air and seaweed kelp pretty much......yummy! She has had the child tested and tested and retested. She has described symptoms of asmtha to Kelly's doctor,,, symptoms we have never witnessed while she is in our care.

CB also attends shrink appts on a continual basis, she is a professional patient, she's on approximately 23 different drugs to keep her stable and doesn't make a decision in her life without discussing it lenght.....unfortunately she must not listen to what her shrink says or she wouldn't behave so nuts. Because it is so normal for her to have a shrink in her life,, she feels Kelly should be seeing one as well. At age three she felt Kelly had emotional problems requiring psychiactric care because Kelly was fussy about what socks she wore. Kelly and my kids had a game that they played around the house that they pretended they were cats, they liked to get bowls with milk it in and drink out of it. Kelly attempted to play this game at CB's one day.. and was quickly diagnosed with 'regressional behavior' by CB requiring immediate help,,,,,,, oh... did I mention that CB claims to be a child psychologist to everyone? Yes..... yes she does, although she's not.....geeshhh!

Mayhem, Murder and Mischief

2005-03-02T13:37:00.000-08:00

Some history.... a few tales to set the scene of where we are today in present day. Early in Jack and my relationship, I was having terrible issues with Asshole. At the time I had been awarded custody of the family home and had 5 years to live in it before it could be sold. This enraged Asshole, he wanted us out, he didn't want to be paying child support or spousal support either. Things became quite violent, he began stalking me, breaking into my home, making death threats towards myself and the children. I put the house up for sale,,, I just didn't want to have to deal with the crazyness anymore but the market was slow and it was not selling fast enough for Assholes liking. The violence continued. I received a peace bond from the police and he was ordered to stay away from me,,,, he breached it many times. Everyone I knew how violent he was becoming over the money and they and myself were fearful that he would end up trying to kill me,,,,,,, CB was aware of this too unfortunately. One evening, she decided it might be fun to contact him, she told him that she knew me and felt that it was only right that he should know that I was purposely not trying to get the house to sell,, that I was taking his child support payments and spending it on drugs and alcohol, that I ran around town laughing about what a fool he was and how funny I though it was that I was taking all his money from him. After getting him suitably enraged with her lies,, she also suggested that he go down to Jacks office and lay a complaint against him saying that he and I were having sex while he was working. All of this was absolutely ludicrious. That evening,,, he arrived at my home drunk and broke in,,, just as she had hoped he would,,,, luckily I had an alarm activated on the house and the police arrived before he could harm me.

CB then went on to do further ridiculous things, she wrote a letter to the RCMP telling them that I was a cocaine dealer,,, she contacted men whom she had heard I had dated prior to Jack and told them I had veneral diseases! lol She started calling friends of mine and telling them I was having affairs with their husbands! She contacted my clients with the same drug dealer stories. She started calling all of Jack's co-workers and inviting them over for sex. Yes... inviting them for sex! lol.. it was actually quite humorous... one of the guys brought in a voice message she had left saying how now that she was single she would like him to come over and get naked in the hot tub with her for sex........ his wife didn't really appreciate the message that much.

The time came that Jack and I decided to move in together, our children got along fabulously. He informed her of the move and the next day she took her daughter to SEVERAL different doctors in town. She told each doctor that there was an 'investigation' going on into sexual abuse by Child Services and she wanted a exam done on her child. She had this poor child endure these invase procedures in an attempt to prevent him from moving in. Of course, as their was no sexual abuse, they found nothing. She wrote to Jack and told him that if he promised to not move in with me that she would stop with contacting Social Services. Jack contacted CB's family doctor to inform her what she was doing,,, the doctor called her in and invited Jack to attend as well. The doctor told CB she had to stop using her daughter like this and upped her medication.
It worked for a few weeks,,,but then back to her crazy old self.

We would arrive to pick Kelly up for Jack's custodial visit, I would wait out in the street in the car. CB would barge out to the car start kicking it, spitting on the windows,, miming jerking off.
If Jack called to speak to Kelly at her mothers house and Kelly asked to speak to either me or my kids, CB would grab the phone out her hands and slam the phone down. She then passed a rule that Kelly was forbidden to speak to anyone in her step-family. Kelly had often called my children from our house during the times that they were away at their fathers,,, she was so afraid that her mother's rule extended to our house that she would get in severe trouble if she did. She would cry often, it was very saddening.

When we would run into them at school functions while she was in her mothers care Kelly would not speak to us at all, acted like we did not exist for fear of making her mother angry. If there were a special event in our lifes that fell on a time that CB had Kelly and we asked if we could have Kelly,, she would only agree if she could attend herself and then she would stand with her hands across her chest GLARING at myself and my kids with extreme hostility. If she got wind that we were attending an event somewhere in town and we had Kelly,, she would show up and literally chase us around.

When my kids go to their fathers,,, at the pickup/drop off,, I give a friendly greeting to Asshole. I then give the kids a kiss and with a big smile tell them to have a fabulous time! Pick ups from CB's house are never that easy,,, CB will stand at the door,,, weeping and stroking Kelly's face. She literally behaves as though Kelly is going off to war to be sent to her death. She goes on to tell her how every minute of the days she will be thinking of her,,, makes Kelly promise back that she will be thinking of her too. It goes on and on and on. Its extremely unsettling to witness this extreme obsession with the child. Kelly will spend her whole visit worrying about how sad her mother is while she is away. The guilt trip is enormous.

When Kelly was 4 she began attending daycare occasionally so that she could interact with other children and get used to being in a school like setting. CB's feeling that Kelly could not live without her started attending the daycare all the time,,,,, I'm not really sure why she even bothered sending her. When CB would leave the daycare she would go though the whole going off to war good bye routine again. Kelly would become extremely upset and when we'd pick her up she'd often be crying in the corner.

The Children and other Stepparents

2005-03-02T09:07:00.000-08:00

Ok,, yesterday we learned about the parents,,, today we'll meet the kids.

1. Jacks daughter Kelly is 6 years old, bright, funny and outgoing. Jack and "CB" seperated when she was 2. They have shared custody and Kelly lives with us half the time.

2. My son, Tom, who is also 6 years old. Tom is extremely considerate, would give you the shirt off his own back, he's also very much a little boy and literally bounces off the wall from place to place. I seperated with ex shortly after Tom was born.

3. My daughter, Alexis, 9 years old. A genius (literally,,, though it sure didn't come from me or my ex!) , social butterfly,, lives to talk on the phone with her girlfriends and who just this year has become embarressed to be seen with her parents.....ohhhhhh it came much sooner than I had hoped! My two children live with us full-time, they're father doesn't bother to have contact with them for months at a time.

There are also some other significant people in my story... the new common-law spouses of the crazy ex-spouses,,, though its very hard to understand how they can put up with them.

1. Dave, who is CB's new living boyfriend, they've been together now for about 3 years, one would think this would have helped CB to get over her bitterness,, but it has not. Dave seems like a very nice man,, outgoing,, kind,,, he's also a very good step-father to Kelly. With CB's mental illness she spends much of her time lying in bed, sleeping or writing out long lists to herself about all the things he obsesses about..... and plotting demented plans against this family. If not for Dave stepping up to the plate and caring for Kelly, the child would spend the majority of her time at her mothers sitting quitely in her bedroom so as not to 'disturb' her ill mother. Dave was previously married,, coincidentely, to another woman who was quite ill.. when she became better and he was no longer required to play the role of caregiver, he left her. He seems to like sick women for whatever reason. He has an 11 year old son from his previous marriage.

2. Dhillon... is Dave's son... he lives with Dave and CB half the time as well. I can't really give any observations on him.. as I've never spoken to the child. CB does not allow interaction between any of the siblings,, they are not allowed to speak to each other on the phone while at the other parents home,, as well,, the children, being EXTREMELY aware of CB's hatred for this family are terrified to even acknowledge this family if we run into them at any events.

3. Irene,,, is Assholes live-in girlfriend,,, very kind, very quiet,,very obiedient filipino woman. My children love her, which pleases me very much. She often visits the children even when the Asshole won't, unfortunately she is too scared to ever point out to him how horribly he is to his children. She would also like to have a child with him one day..... though god only knows why when she sees first hand how he treats his existing ones.

Remaining sane with crazy ex spouses

2005-03-02T01:30:00.000-08:00

Step family.... blended family.... whatever you want to call them are filled with unique issues all unto their own..... when you throw in two mentally ill ex-spouses ... watch out! I've decided that writing out my issues is a much better solution than reacting in a.... er..um... more hostile manner. lol

This is my story... probably not interesting to anyone else, unless perhaps your living it too. Perhaps you have some solutions to offer..... or maybe if we all team up together we can get a reduced rate on having the crazy ex's commited.

Hmm,,, now where to start...

Let me begin by introducing the main players... I'll list them in order of crazyness :

1. Crazy Bitch... commonly referred to as"CB".. who is my husbands ex-wife. Manic Depressive rapid cycler, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Narcissist, Anorexic and all around evil person.

2. Asshole... commonly referred to as just plain old "Asshole"... who is my ex-husband. Manic-Depressive, Alcoholic, Sociopath and all around nasty person.

3. Me! .... you can me Jane... though its not what i'm commonly referred too cause it isn't my name... but whatever.

4. My husband... who you can call Jack.... wonderful man, who I have been blessed to be with.

I'm tired now.. so I will follow up with the other key players... the children... the ex's new partners and then I will get into the real juicy stuff... like when CB tried to have Asshole kill me... stay tuned.